My girlfriend has declared that this is “The Year of the Andrea!” and I’m so with that! Many of us are hard-working women of different backgrounds, socioeconomic status, educational levels, and social standing. I happen to be a working wife and mother of two awesome school-aged girls and three adult Black men. It’s not easy. My girlfriend Andrea is a hardworking wife and mother of the most precious school-aged child and two aspiring college students. Can you say broke as a joke? Maybe not “broke” but struggling is a fair assessment. And many of my friends are a very similar situation.
We are hardworking women with good jobs or self-employed or both, managing a household, a husband or significant other, children expenses, the education of our families, and community necessities. That last item will be defined and explored in more detail. First, I must make the very important point that we expend most of our energy on others with less than the appropriate amount of time spent on ourselves. We see our homes, our children, our spouse/significant other as OUR priority; even our community has necessary actions and roles that we must commit.
What are the “community necessities” with which I speak? It’s the PTA membership and active committee responsibilities, volunteering at church, serving on the board of the local recreation, community center and/or advocacy group, being active in our home-owners association – not just a paid member, serving as a Girl Scout or Boy Scout leader. Now how many people serve our communities and consider it a necessity? Well, we must make time for us!
So this year, my good girlfriend decided that 2015 is “The Year of the Andrea!” and I am so with that!! It’s about me, my wants, my needs, my aspirations. That doesn’t mean that I won’t continue what I’ve always and should do. It just means that there will be times when I think about me; take care of me, do for me, love me – and it might be at the expense of the husband, children, school or community. They will have to learn that Mummy can do what they’ve always done, look out for me first – even if it may only be once in a while. That’s better than never or rarely – it will be regularly, consistently and without apology! So get ready, get used to it, Get Excited!! I am!
As we travel on this journey, we will share lessons from my more balance friends. We will explore how to make time, space and accommodations for ourselves. We will learn to relax or chillax if that’s your pleasure. Because no matter where you are, what you are doing or who you are with, this is your year!
I said it when I declared myself “Flawless and 45” and repeat it here. As life is ever-changing, I am changing my view of myself and the world. I am still a Feminist expressly, defined as “a person who believes in the Social, Political, and Economic Equality of the sexes.” I also better understand what Beyoncé may mean when she recites “Bow down” and retorts, “My Momma taught me good home training. My Daddy taught me how to love my haters. My sister taught me I should speak my mind. My man made me feel so God damn fine. I’m flawless!”
It’s my year! Make it yours too!!